I admire your open minded inquiry into matters of mystical and spiritual significance, as well as powerfully controversial and likely to incur negative consequences such as specious feedback and hostile banter. I have no such intention. The topic is very close to my heart and soul. I "suffered the revelation of Jesus Christ" and managed to negotiate the 'long strange trip' through the netherworld, and recover some semblance of well being. I might chalk this up to drug fueled psychosis, but for synchronicities and real events which challenge the rational skepticism for some logical explanation. One thing I would assert right up front and in no uncertain terms, I am not claiming holiness, nor superior anything. Daniel's inquiry opens an opportunity for me to reflect on the circumstances of my initiation. Believe me, it is not easy, it is far too strange and uncomfortable a territory, akin to psychosis, or worse yet, metempsychosis. Where to begin? Indeed, the whole point seems to involve a narrative which draws upon mythological memes, or images, that can offer meaning, or context. It is neither scientific evidence, nor concrete proof, it's mythologizing and projecting the collective myth onto one's personal experience. Further complicated by the imagination's role in all this. Yes, there are factual, historical things which are objectively uncanny; but the majority of the long ordeal was internal, private insofar as, other physical beings around me were not aware of what was occurring in my imagination (although many spiritual beings, and things in the 'otherworld', the inner realm where imagination can take flight and usurp reason and even the five sense.
I suspect I experiences Christ consciousness, because I was personally, and somewhat secretly devoted to Jesus before the spiritual emergency which slew my previous persona identity. It's difficult to articulate, or know where to begin explaining the circumstances, and the magnitude of disruption that overwhelmed me. A simple psychological explanation would suffice it to say, at 18 years old I underwent a non-differentiated schizophrenic episode. However, this pejorative explanation is grossly anemic and fails to address what I'll call the uncanny synchronicities, which straddle the borders of psychosis and mysticism. Perhaps the most succinct description of the dilemma associated with my Christ consciousness event, would be to say my ego was utterly undone. This did not occur out of nowhere, I was completely obsessed with the 'otherworld' for years before I experienced a classic shamanic kundalini episode- on New Year's Eve 1977, whereat I shot like a short hairy rocket through a vast tower of angelic choirs through the North Star, into some curious glyph and was annihilated; my former self extinguished; while back on earth, I experienced becoming inside out. This is too weird to address logically. I'd say, I entered a phase in which my environment, my friends and family, had much of the responsibility for my coping with things. While my mind was in a full on dream state that never came back to the mundane reality. I might have moments, but all was quickly consumed by otherworldly inflations and terrors that could reveal themselves without my ability to control or extinguish the visionary reality.
Perhaps another important factor that makes this a seemingly real experience of Christ consciousness, is that the first stage I entered back to earth from the singularity of annihilation, was believing, and experiencing, firsthand, that I was the Sun. My five sense seemed to be a mirage in the corona of the star. I was convinced I was a star dreaming of the 20th Century as Frank LaVoie. It was a short journey to believe my Sol-self was Jesus. If that all sounds like an all-too-common psychosis, it got much weirder. About a week into this harrowing drama, in which my friends scattered like rats on a sinking ship, and my family did not greet my "good news" with anything but scorn and horror. About a week or two into this harrowing ordeal, I experienced myself becoming pregnant. I even lactated for real, that's pretty interesting. This crisis culminated when I witnessed my mother turn into the Beast of the Apocalypse with four monstrous faces on her head, and ran naked (but in my underwear) into the frigid deep snow of winter in Buffalo. When I signed my name to the Psychiatric Hospital Admissions, I believed I was signing myself to Hell, and complete insignificance, and this was necessary for earth's evolution. One Christ had to become Christ in everyone, and I chose everyone. This was both psychotic inflation, and the humility inherent to Christ consciousness. Self-sacrifice is the one true over-riding imperative that I was driven by in this long and complicated and indescribable ordeal. It went on for 13 years before I experienced myself fall from the crown of heaven, back into my physical body, in 1990, while living in Bolinas (the Whale) California. During the biggest display of lightning I've ever witnessed. And about an hour before running into a man who'd seen a sea serpent at the Beach below the bluff we were standing on. A story I'd read about in National Geographic about 6 months before I turned inside-out. When I knew I really had to meet this man. It's strange synchronicities like that which make the narrative more than simple psychosis, and give it the veneer, or numinosity of an authentic shamanic initiation.
I managed to awaken the cosmic serpent kundalini, it unleashed a torrent of psychotic and visionary states, I call the bardos. I experienced Christ consciouness because it was in Christ that I found safety and grounding during numberless LSD episodes in the 1970's, in which I experienced panic attacks, or descent into hell realms, and to survive, I would chant mantras, including "Lamb of God." . I'll stop here. Perhaps there's more to say another time
I admire your open minded inquiry into matters of mystical and spiritual significance, as well as powerfully controversial and likely to incur negative consequences such as specious feedback and hostile banter. I have no such intention. The topic is very close to my heart and soul. I "suffered the revelation of Jesus Christ" and managed to negotiate the 'long strange trip' through the netherworld, and recover some semblance of well being. I might chalk this up to drug fueled psychosis, but for synchronicities and real events which challenge the rational skepticism for some logical explanation. One thing I would assert right up front and in no uncertain terms, I am not claiming holiness, nor superior anything. Daniel's inquiry opens an opportunity for me to reflect on the circumstances of my initiation. Believe me, it is not easy, it is far too strange and uncomfortable a territory, akin to psychosis, or worse yet, metempsychosis. Where to begin? Indeed, the whole point seems to involve a narrative which draws upon mythological memes, or images, that can offer meaning, or context. It is neither scientific evidence, nor concrete proof, it's mythologizing and projecting the collective myth onto one's personal experience. Further complicated by the imagination's role in all this. Yes, there are factual, historical things which are objectively uncanny; but the majority of the long ordeal was internal, private insofar as, other physical beings around me were not aware of what was occurring in my imagination (although many spiritual beings, and things in the 'otherworld', the inner realm where imagination can take flight and usurp reason and even the five sense.
I suspect I experiences Christ consciousness, because I was personally, and somewhat secretly devoted to Jesus before the spiritual emergency which slew my previous persona identity. It's difficult to articulate, or know where to begin explaining the circumstances, and the magnitude of disruption that overwhelmed me. A simple psychological explanation would suffice it to say, at 18 years old I underwent a non-differentiated schizophrenic episode. However, this pejorative explanation is grossly anemic and fails to address what I'll call the uncanny synchronicities, which straddle the borders of psychosis and mysticism. Perhaps the most succinct description of the dilemma associated with my Christ consciousness event, would be to say my ego was utterly undone. This did not occur out of nowhere, I was completely obsessed with the 'otherworld' for years before I experienced a classic shamanic kundalini episode- on New Year's Eve 1977, whereat I shot like a short hairy rocket through a vast tower of angelic choirs through the North Star, into some curious glyph and was annihilated; my former self extinguished; while back on earth, I experienced becoming inside out. This is too weird to address logically. I'd say, I entered a phase in which my environment, my friends and family, had much of the responsibility for my coping with things. While my mind was in a full on dream state that never came back to the mundane reality. I might have moments, but all was quickly consumed by otherworldly inflations and terrors that could reveal themselves without my ability to control or extinguish the visionary reality.
Perhaps another important factor that makes this a seemingly real experience of Christ consciousness, is that the first stage I entered back to earth from the singularity of annihilation, was believing, and experiencing, firsthand, that I was the Sun. My five sense seemed to be a mirage in the corona of the star. I was convinced I was a star dreaming of the 20th Century as Frank LaVoie. It was a short journey to believe my Sol-self was Jesus. If that all sounds like an all-too-common psychosis, it got much weirder. About a week into this harrowing drama, in which my friends scattered like rats on a sinking ship, and my family did not greet my "good news" with anything but scorn and horror. About a week or two into this harrowing ordeal, I experienced myself becoming pregnant. I even lactated for real, that's pretty interesting. This crisis culminated when I witnessed my mother turn into the Beast of the Apocalypse with four monstrous faces on her head, and ran naked (but in my underwear) into the frigid deep snow of winter in Buffalo. When I signed my name to the Psychiatric Hospital Admissions, I believed I was signing myself to Hell, and complete insignificance, and this was necessary for earth's evolution. One Christ had to become Christ in everyone, and I chose everyone. This was both psychotic inflation, and the humility inherent to Christ consciousness. Self-sacrifice is the one true over-riding imperative that I was driven by in this long and complicated and indescribable ordeal. It went on for 13 years before I experienced myself fall from the crown of heaven, back into my physical body, in 1990, while living in Bolinas (the Whale) California. During the biggest display of lightning I've ever witnessed. And about an hour before running into a man who'd seen a sea serpent at the Beach below the bluff we were standing on. A story I'd read about in National Geographic about 6 months before I turned inside-out. When I knew I really had to meet this man. It's strange synchronicities like that which make the narrative more than simple psychosis, and give it the veneer, or numinosity of an authentic shamanic initiation.
I managed to awaken the cosmic serpent kundalini, it unleashed a torrent of psychotic and visionary states, I call the bardos. I experienced Christ consciouness because it was in Christ that I found safety and grounding during numberless LSD episodes in the 1970's, in which I experienced panic attacks, or descent into hell realms, and to survive, I would chant mantras, including "Lamb of God." . I'll stop here. Perhaps there's more to say another time
the naked bible